Conspiracy Theories and Male Egos

Why do I feel like I am (and Sean) surrounded by a bunch of conspiracies? You're probably wondering what I'm talking about. Let me explain.

The first conspiracy.
Does this sweet face look like it belongs to a conspiracy?

Or this?

Okay, that second one is questionable. We have been dealing with really painful gas (ultimately my fault-something I ate!) for the past twelve hours or so. Seems the conspiracy here, is that as soon as I get Alice to sleep and myself, someone (not naming names here) seems to think it is acceptable to party for several hours. And take a short break (about twenty minutes so the Mama can get a taste of what sweet sleep would be like!) and resume. So when "normal" hours roll around, it is then sleepy time. UNTIL, you guessed it, nap time! Then it is party time! Yes, we are dealing with the whole night/day confusion. I really just think HJ has a "Mama to himself" conspiracy going on!

I just keep reminding myself how quickly time passes, and soon he won't be this little and I won't be up all hours of the day. So when I'm dead tired, and just want to pitch a fit/scream/cry, I keep saying that to myself!



I don't have a picture of the second conspirators. Truly, if there ever was a conspiracy, these people would be without a doubt! The Evil CDL People!

I'm not going to say Sean failed again (he did), but I prefer to say that these asses as just too freaking picky and really like to make money. He wasn't passed today because his "shifting wasn't smooth enough". WTH? So he attempts round four tomorrow. Yes, it seems we are paying someone's salary this week. Conspiracy? Most definitely!

The third conspirator?

She fell asleep on the floor after pitching a huge fit! I was busy nursing HJ, and had given her two M&M's (which are tightly clenched, one in each fist) to bribe her for a few more minutes.

I think that about explains itself. Except that is chocolate (not poop-thank God!). Someone loves baths so much, she will go to any measures to make sure she gets more than one a day!

Even though they may be in a pact to see that this Mama gets no sleep, a shower, or time to do anything else except tend to their needs, they are just the sweetest! I wouldn't trade any of this for more sleep, a shower, or a clean house/laundry!

And the fragile male ego? I'm not really going to address that, so much as just say that when Sean got home he informed me he was going to work on the car himself. He is tired of everyone making him feel "this big" (which was about an inch). He is not a stupid, fucking idiot and is tired of being talked to and treated like that. So he "needs to do this" (the car thing) to make himself feel better. Oh, along with passing "that damn test"!

Poor guy! I told him I support him 100% and whatever I could do, I would. So I'm going to suggest he sleep in the other bedroom tonight, so he can maybe get more than four hours of sleep. And I may go get him some beer too. In the meantime, I'm to pretend he isn't here until the car is done. No distractions or interruptions, please!